How to Have More Meaningful Networking Conversations

Ever meet “That Guy” at a networking event who gives you his business card before asking what you do? There’s a much better way to go about networking, let’s look at both the downside and the positive side of things.

Ever get annoyed with “That Guy” and want to run away? Me too. Yet it still happens.

The crazier thing is when he gives you two business cards and tells you “If you have a friend that needs my services, please give them my card”. Really? We just met. Like I’m going to risk a valued relationship to give a stranger a referral.

Blame it on Traditional Networking Training

People are trained from early on in their networking careers to give the perfect “elevator pitch” to open conversations at networking events. For the most part the end game there is to get the person’s attention, engage them in a conversation to qualify (or disqualify) them as a prospect and either set up a follow up meeting or move onto the next possible suspect.

The problem with that approach is that’s it’s purely transactional. It’s the “everybody you meet is a potential client” approach to networking. In that case, I believe you’re not networking. You’re speed-prospecting, like speed-dating, only more annoying in the business world than the dating world.

In that scenario it’s a numbers game. To some degree, the sales world is a numbers game. There are just better ways to go about it by adopting a relationship-based approach as opposed to a transactional approach to networking.

Consider this Productive Approach to More Meaningful Networking

Consider the other side of the coin when someone wants to talk about your first, learn why you’re at the event and then tries to discover the types of resources and connections you need. Before they talk about themselves. They’re naturally curious and make the first half of the conversation all about you.

How much more likely are you going to want to set up a call or meeting with that person? Those types of people win in the networking world because people eventually want to do business with them.

Let me say this: Yes, they are qualifying you to some extent. But they’re qualifying you as a potential prospect AND/OR a potential referral partner. Maybe you’ll never be a client of theirs, but you know their potential clients.

By asking about you first they can uncover a two-way street beyond a single sale. That’s a more productive first-time conversation than turning you away because you don’t fit their client profile. It’s also opening a conversation about how they might be able to help you with business development since you share similar target markets.

You can do the same thing during your networking conversations.

Listen More Than You Talk at Networking Events

That’s “The Guy (or Girl)” you want to be. The easiest thing in the world to do in networking situations is let the other person talk first. Then craft your response accordingly and relate it to their world instead of always using the same “elevator pitch”; that way they know you were really listening.

Know your niche market(s) and what problems your service solves for them. Then discover if the person you’re talking to is either in your niche market with a need for your solution, or if they know the people in your niche market with that problem. You discover that by asking quality questions and letting them speak first. If they know people in your target market(s) you probably have a lot to talk about. Doing that is the process of selling through the room instead of to the room.

**Selling Through the Room Instead of to the Room**

I learned that concept when I interviewed Ivan Misner, the founder of Business Network International (BNI has over 11,000 chapters and over 270,000 members giving and getting referrals worldwide). He was the keynote speaker at a conference with some 900 people in attendance. He first asked them “By a show of hands, how many people here would like to sell something at this conference?” Almost everybody’s hands went up.

He then asked, “By a show of hands, how many people here came to buy something?” Almost nobody’s hands went up. Those are the unfortunate circumstances people face when they go to networking events with the hopes of making a quick sale.

Give it a shot. The next time you go to a networking event share your ideal client if you’d like, but rather than searching for a sale search for potential referral partners. People will be at ease while talking to you because your conversation isn’t a high-pressure sales pitch. It’s a conversation about the possibility to co-create business development opportunities.

Then YOU become the person people eventually want to do business with.

Here’s to successful networking that will lead to more meaningful relationships and better business development!

Onwards and upwards!

Want more networking advice? Click here to check out this podcast episode “How to Develop the Mindset for Successful Networking with Dr. Ivan Misner”

You can get my book here: “Idea Climbing: How to Create a Support System for Your Next Big Idea”