The last time you faced a problem – Who helped?

The last time a friend faced a problem – How did you help?

There’s more to problems than just advice, although that’s part of it. The bigger picture is changing someone’s life. When trying to find a succinct “WHY???” for mentoring (why it’s important) along with a “HOW is it done???” a simple statement popped into my head. After 15 years of research, interviews and presentations it became apparent that…

“People With Purpose And Support Won’t Fail”

That being said let’s look at…

WHAT IT’S NOT

It’s not that they CAN’T fail. That’s called free will. You don’t have to show up for that meeting, apply for that job or start that business. You can do a little extra work and go the extra mile or you can find any countless distractions in life and get stuck in complacency and inaction. Either way it’s your choice.

It’s not that they DON’T fail. People trip all the time. It’s a matter of getting back up. But how can you get back up AGAIN if you’ve already been trying for so long? How can you get back up the first time if you’re in unchartered territory?

You need to move between those moments of stumbling and doubt and reach out. But to who and how?  You need to build…

THE BRIDGE: ASKING FOR HELP

What happens with permanent failure (which only happens when you completely stop trying) is often people lack purpose. It’s not worth getting up THAT early in the morning or taking a change THAT big if there’s not a LOT of passion behind the decision. There has to be an amazing reason to keep on keepin’ on. That’s your purpose. Once you find purpose you need to try new things, take new actions and get new results with a little help from your friends. That’s support.

That’s where mentoring comes in. And that starts by reaching out and asking for help. Now let’s look at…

WHAT IT IS – FOR BOTH OF YOU

People with purpose and support don’t have either one without someone else. For purpose: Yes, why do you want to do this. But there needs to be more – why will your actions help the greater good? How will OTHER people benefit from what you do? For support: The “lone wolf” theory in life is garbage. You can’t go it alone. You have to take actions on your own but you need the support to take actions in the first place, to get back up when you trip and to celebrate the victories along the way.

Let’s look at what mentoring is.

“Mentoring is giving people the advice, support and connections they need
to solve problems and create opportunities.”

  • BEING MENTORED: Find people with been-there-done-that experience; they’ve already walked in your shoes (on some level) and can help you create opportunities, avoid mistakes and solve problems based on real world results. The FIRST thing to share with them is not only why you need help but why you’re passionate about what you’re doing. There must be something you like about it; connect with that to find your fuel and a reason to keep trying.
  • MENTORING SOMEONE: Connect with people with similar passions; FIRST help them find their purpose. This doesn’t mean the secret of life; a light doesn’t have to shine down from the skies and poof… All their problems are gone. Even if it’s a small project they need help with: Connect them to their purpose for the project – why are they doing it? What do they love about it?  Then offer them advice, support and connections to succeed.

That’s your starting point.

Here’s my full mantra and WHY you should seek mentors and mentor others. Every day. Offer to help SOMEONE because:

“People With Purpose And Support Won’t Fail.
No Matter How Bad Things Get Nobody Should Have To Walk Alone And
No Matter How Great Things Get Nobody Should Have To Celebrate Alone.”